Relationship Problem Need Opinion.

[RagnarLodbrok]

I have been going out with the same woman for about seven months and she is a nice respectable woman and I love her alot.


My problem is our ideas about family and dating are so different that often we come into conflict.


For instance she believes that women should wait til their late thirties to start having a family and that having children any earlier is just a terrible burden or curse. She apparently thinks money and job occupation is far more important than family.


I myself believe that there is nothing wrong having kids at a early age between eighteen and early twenties. I believe children to be a gift of the Gods and somthing that should be cherished and loved. Having kids should not be looked as a burden but as a beautiful asset and gift.

Though right now I am in no hurry to have kids I do look forward to it and of course I think waiting til your thirties to be a bit ridiculous.

Another issue me and my girlfriend get in arguments about is dating and ethnicity.

She believes it is ok for couples to have interracial relationships and says if she has children if they marry a non-European she would have no anger in the situation.

I look down at all interracial relationships because I believe in preserving the European line. I want strong European descendants. When I see people in interracial relationships I try to ignore it and say nothing because people will do what they want.

I will however say I would rather have my son or daughter be dead to me then to think they would corrupt my family line by going into a interracial relationship.


Am I wrong to think this? I do not think I am wrong.

Any advice?

[texas heathen]

Ok these are just my two cents. I agree with you having kids early is not a burden. The whole thing about having kids at 30 + is to me at least more of a greed thing! The value system has been shifted drastically in the past thirty years. I agree that if you can not afford it do not have children, but people seem to think that a wide screen t.v. and a s.u.v. are the things in life to strive for! I personally want a strong and healthy folk, I love my kids and want more & would give up any modern convenience to provide for them.
Ok I am ranting, Is your old lady a heathen or kinda in the process? Show her some of Aud's articles on here. If you want to discuss the other part of you post PM me. Best of luck to you.
FFF/HTR
Clif AOR

[RagnarLodbrok]

Ok these are just my two cents. I agree with you having kids early is not a burden. The whole thing about having kids at 30 + is to me at least more of a greed thing! The value system has been shifted drastically in the past thirty years. I agree that if you can not afford it do not have children, but people seem to think that a wide screen t.v. and a s.u.v. are the things in life to strive for! I personally want a strong and healthy folk, I love my kids and want more & would give up any modern convenience to provide for them.
Ok I am ranting, Is your old lady a heathen or kinda in the process? Show her some of Aud's articles on here. If you want to discuss the other part of you post PM me. Best of luck to you.
FFF/HTR
Clif AOR

It is hard to discuss my girlfriend's view. She was for a very long time a wiccan but then she read the history of wicca and for a couple of months now totally rejected the notion of it.

She says she worships a God and Goddess who she calls the " Lord" and " Lady". She is deeply into witchcraft. When I say she is in witchcraft no she is not immature in the subject she is deep in the meditation and symbolic notions of it. She is pretty mature in the aspect of spirituality always questioning everything and studying.

I have never questioned her beliefs , I try to respect her beliefs to whatever end she seeks fit.

Sure message me about the other question if you can I would appreciate it.

[aud_friggsdottir]

I don't want to rant either, but before you marry a person you really need to work out such important issues first. Love is important, but there is more to a relationship than love. Commonality of beliefs, goals, religion, even politics is important. Some people have perfectly happy marriages when each have different values, but I think that is really the exception and not the rule. And perhaps depends on how one defines happiness.

Some one has to give on something. Better to give on small things, than on critical ones...like children, lifelong goals, etc... It is all well and good when it is just the couple, but when a child is a part of the equation...the husband and wife HAVE TO be on the same page or at least agree on how that child/ren is/are raised. I know some folks that have Christian spouses, and I don't know how they make it work. I am so opinionated and stubborn that I wouldn't stay married long...lol. So really I can't comment on that, sounds as though you are not in that boat.

As to finances...well children are only as expensive as you make them. Where there is a will there is a way. We had our first when I was 18, 2nd at 20, 3rd at 21, 4th at 23, 5th at 26, and finally #6 at 32.... Our legacy isn't our suvs, tvs, big houses, nice toys, etc.... it is our Folkway, and there isn't a Folkway without children (or Folk).

...ok...so I said I didn't want to rant, but I did...sorry!

FFF
Kathy

[Hengest]

I

As to finances...well children are only as expensive as you make them. Where there is a will there is a way. We had our first when I was 18, 2nd at 20, 3rd at 21, 4th at 23, 5th at 26, and finally #6 at 32.... Our legacy isn't our suvs, tvs, big houses, nice toys, etc.... it is our Folkway, and there isn't a Folkway without children (or Folk).

...ok...so I said I didn't want to rant, but I did...sorry!

FFF
Kathy


Totally agree with this. We always see news articles or tv shows saying that it costs XYZ to raise a kid but these things are invariably written by well off middles class types who don't have to sit and consider cheaper alternatives.

When we had our first kid we were very poor but he never went without any of the essential things. We just had the chaeper versions that did the same job just as well but didn't have the fancy trimmings.

[SaraN]

I think having kids is the most important thing we can do but if she isn't ready then she shouldn't. If you want them sooner than she does (and you disagree on some other issues about what you teach them) she may not be the one for you. I've always felt the need to have as many children as I can and still remain healthy. Before I got married I went into every possible relationship with that (and a list of other things, politics and religion etc.) in mind and met plenty of guys who didn't want what I did, it was easy for me to walk away, I knew I'd find who I was looking for but not if I was wasting my time with guys weren't on the same page.

My husband and I put it all out there when we first started talking. We discussed everything that was important to both of us and decided to continue with the relationship because we truly were looking for the same things in life. I think it was easy for me to find him because we both have such strong opinions on EVERYTHING and I was only looking in a small population of people (spanning a large area).

Anyway, you'll find the right one.

[Adalwolf]

I hate to intrude on your topic, but I feel it would be unnecessary to make another.

My situation is thus: I've been good friends with a girl for about 2 and half weeks. We met online (MySpace) and then we met in school and we became really good friends. I did ask her out, but she said she'd just gotten out of bad relationship, and to pretty much just be patient. So I was.

Well, one day one of her enemies comes up and starts talking trash to her. Naturally, I stood up for her. As a result, I've got two people that want to kick my @$$. Now, she's saying that we can't talk at school anymore, but we can still talk online. My guess is she's either lying or she's trying to protect me. Thoughts?

[Sigurd]

I don't want to rant either, but before you marry a person you really need to work out such important issues first. Love is important, but there is more to a relationship than love. Commonality of beliefs, goals, religion, even politics is important. Some people have perfectly happy marriages when each have different values, but I think that is really the exception and not the rule. And perhaps depends on how one defines happiness.

Some one has to give on something. Better to give on small things, than on critical ones...like children, lifelong goals, etc... It is all well and good when it is just the couple, but when a child is a part of the equation...the husband and wife HAVE TO be on the same page or at least agree on how that child/ren is/are raised. I know some folks that have Christian spouses, and I don't know how they make it work. I am so opinionated and stubborn that I wouldn't stay married long...lol. So really I can't comment on that, sounds as though you are not in that boat.

As to finances...well children are only as expensive as you make them. Where there is a will there is a way. We had our first when I was 18, 2nd at 20, 3rd at 21, 4th at 23, 5th at 26, and finally #6 at 32.... Our legacy isn't our suvs, tvs, big houses, nice toys, etc.... it is our Folkway, and there isn't a Folkway without children (or Folk).

...ok...so I said I didn't want to rant, but I did...sorry!

FFF
Kathy

This post is exactly why I respect people like you. :thumbup:


When we had our first kid we were very poor but he never went without any of the essential things. We just had the chaeper versions that did the same job just as well but didn't have the fancy trimmings.

True, one of my little brothers got one of those magnet games. To him it made no difference whether he got the GeoMag one for €90 or the ALDI one for €25.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

For my own sake, I am likely to wait until I am maybe 22 or 23 (which is when I will have finished Uni), because before that I know that I cannot give the child the attention it deserves. But I'm not willing to wait much longer than that. As somebody who views children as a "good thing" rather than a burden, I wouldn't even mind six or seven of them running around in the house. If it means that there's no TV in the House, or that we have to buy at LIDL - so be it! :shrug:

Well, of course, first I need to find the right woman before I can decide up these kind of things.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

@ Ragnar: Sounds "stupid" but these are issues that have to be cleared up. My mother always wanted another child, but my stepfather said he was content with just looking after me. There were several arguments and grievances, until it actually happened by accident, from which point on my little brother's been my a well-guarded precious, and they've been getting on quite fine. :)

Issues such as timing of children and their upbringing, and/or religion, worldview etc. are a crucial point; to some extent politics as well. For example, I could never be with a woman that hates nature, is a fundi Christian, wants a single child at age 40 and was a total lefty race-mixing person.
They tell you from a young age that "opposites attract". That may be the case with some people, but when there are common factors, there is a chance that the whole thing will actually last. Here I have to look at my parents who always had different viewpoints and stayed together for only 7 years, 10 months of which married, 2 1/2 yrs with a common child, until they divorced; and compare it to my paternal grandparents, who stayed together, married for 48 years, with 6 children, 24 grandchildren and (so far) 2 greatgrandchildren, and who were always united by common interests - until death did them part (2001, when my grandfather died aged 74). Same for my maternal grandparents. They have been married for 45 years now, without greater problems. Common interests, same political opinion, same profession when still working, etc., with 3 children, all of which became healthy adults.

Common interests, common viewpoints, a number of children and love - if all these things are there, it is likely that the whole thing will last for a long time; children are, usually, a thing that binds two people together (sadly not always :().
Now call me a useless romantic, but I believe that if there's the *extraordinary* connection, then it may last forever. :D

[hrolf]

My girlfriend and I are on the same page on just about everything, and the few things we aren't, aren't really important. We both want to have kids when she is about 25, and we have the pretty much the same political views, and the same social views. She isn't a Heathen, but has a strong interest in our ways, and I am quite sure that she will become a Heathen at some point. Her outlook on life is very similar to that of our already, and I think she will make a fine Heathen when the time is right. Her ex was also an Odinist, so she has had quite a bit of exposure to it already.

[Hengest]

My wife just read this and here is her opinion:


Why are they thinking of having kids together after just 7 months?

Saying she wants money and a career is maybe her way of saying she doesn't want kids at all.

Sometimes you can't have it all and she needs to realise that money doesn't make children, parents do.

Well, those are just a few of the things she ranted on about, she doesn't have much time for anyone that would put money or career before children.

[Katia]

I've come to the realisation that when I'm lying on my death bed one day, I won't think back about the money I strived for (which is usually an endless dream no matter what position you're in financially.. "I could have xxx if I just worked a bit more..."). I want to be surrounded by my children and family when I pass from this realm. In my opinion one of the reasons our folk is dying out is because women are putting off having children for so long, often times until it's too late and they have to seek fertility treatments and spend thousands of dollars just to have one! Our capitalist society has really warped our "needs". I ask myself, What's the point of having a huge house if you don't have a dozen kids running around in it? :)

[BerserkDog]

Katia,
I believe the main challenge in rearing children today vs. 50+ years ago is that it used to only take one income to raise a family. It can still be done but, as more women enter the workforce and neglect the home life the pay-per-family is diluted. The capitalist society expects women to work and the pay reflects this. I have not asked my wife to work, ever. She plans to in a few years but only as something she wants to do when our children are both in school.

It is a shame when a society places more emphasis on material gain than on their own families.

[Sigurd]

I ask myself, What's the point of having a huge house if you don't have a dozen kids running around in it? :)

That is true. A girl at school was daughter to a rich man. Single child. Father left home pretty soon, and the mother was left with the House (the father had 7 others anyway!). The daughter now inhabits five (!) rooms, and does not have a clue what to do with them! :rolleyes:
This house should have given place for at least 11 or 12 children! And the budget too! So why is it that those that can provide the best for children are always those that choose to have none, is what I ask myself?!

[aud_friggsdottir]

I think anyone who thinks it can't be done on one income or rather a main income (because in reality...women who do stay home find ways to bring in money) should come and hang out with some home schoolers... I don't have enough fingers and toes to count the amount of families that have more than 2 kids (often several) and the mom stays at home and teaches the children. Now like I said they do bring in extra money and fancy budgeting, but again where there is a will there is a way. If a family wants it bad enough...they will make it work...smaller houses, one car, home cooked meals, second hand clothes, home education, no cable, it CAN be done. " I can't afford it..." usually means, "I won't do what it takes TO afford it."

FFF
Kathy

[BerserkDog]

.....So why is it that those that can provide the best for children are always those that choose to have none, is what I ask myself?!

They worship the money god. To do a lot in this World you need it but, most of the fools take it overboard. I work my **** off for my family but I'd take them over any pile of money anyday. I'm glad we had ours "young"-er than most. I may still be "cool" to my kids when they get older. Doubtful as most kids these days already think "Pearl Jam" is oldies rock...... :o

[RagnarLodbrok]

I don't want to rant either, but before you marry a person you really need to work out such important issues first. Love is important, but there is more to a relationship than love. Commonality of beliefs, goals, religion, even politics is important. Some people have perfectly happy marriages when each have different values, but I think that is really the exception and not the rule. And perhaps depends on how one defines happiness.

Some one has to give on something. Better to give on small things, than on critical ones...like children, lifelong goals, etc... It is all well and good when it is just the couple, but when a child is a part of the equation...the husband and wife HAVE TO be on the same page or at least agree on how that child/ren is/are raised. I know some folks that have Christian spouses, and I don't know how they make it work. I am so opinionated and stubborn that I wouldn't stay married long...lol. So really I can't comment on that, sounds as though you are not in that boat.

As to finances...well children are only as expensive as you make them. Where there is a will there is a way. We had our first when I was 18, 2nd at 20, 3rd at 21, 4th at 23, 5th at 26, and finally #6 at 32.... Our legacy isn't our suvs, tvs, big houses, nice toys, etc.... it is our Folkway, and there isn't a Folkway without children (or Folk).

...ok...so I said I didn't want to rant, but I did...sorry!

FFF
Kathy

Yes I agree , and we have only gone out for seven months and I am trying to bring everything out in front of her to make sure we can work everything out in the long run. Before I met her I dated many women and they all betrayed,cheated,hurted me to the point I really went through a deep depression on issues of dating and women altogether.

When I met my girlfriend whom I am with now , she seemed to be everything I was looking for. We are still really good in our relationship and we get along real well but I am just now noticing the differences between us and it really is disturbing me some of the issues that we speak of.


Even though there are many differences I am trying to find compromises so that our relationship can blossom more into somthing beautiful.

I am definately not rushing into marriage I did somthing like that once where I tried to get engaged and it went terrible and sour. I will never do it again.

I agree with your statement of children , and that was what I told her. She upset me greatly yesterday when she talked about college and occupation first and perhaps the best time having a kid would be in her thirties. I am the opposite I put family and friends first before occupation, as there is plenty of time to make a career for oneself.


We of course are not planning on having a child anytime soon we were just talking about it. We have had one pregnancy scare before of course it turned out to be nothing. We were merely talking of our futures and her perspective disturbed me slightly.

[RagnarLodbrok]

Totally agree with this. We always see news articles or tv shows saying that it costs XYZ to raise a kid but these things are invariably written by well off middles class types who don't have to sit and consider cheaper alternatives.

When we had our first kid we were very poor but he never went without any of the essential things. We just had the chaeper versions that did the same job just as well but didn't have the fancy trimmings.

Exactly I am tired of people putting money and materialism before family it makes me sick. Children are eternal and materials die with you but a love for a child does not.

[RagnarLodbrok]

I think having kids is the most important thing we can do but if she isn't ready then she shouldn't. If you want them sooner than she does (and you disagree on some other issues about what you teach them) she may not be the one for you. I've always felt the need to have as many children as I can and still remain healthy. Before I got married I went into every possible relationship with that (and a list of other things, politics and religion etc.) in mind and met plenty of guys who didn't want what I did, it was easy for me to walk away, I knew I'd find who I was looking for but not if I was wasting my time with guys weren't on the same page.

My husband and I put it all out there when we first started talking. We discussed everything that was important to both of us and decided to continue with the relationship because we truly were looking for the same things in life. I think it was easy for me to find him because we both have such strong opinions on EVERYTHING and I was only looking in a small population of people (spanning a large area).

Anyway, you'll find the right one.

My dream is to have two or three children and to be happily married. I do hope she is the one for me because she has been the only kind woman to myself in my whole life. I am scared to think we will not work out. I am trying everything I know as a man to work This relationship out.


We are not married so I suppose it is good to start working these things out now before it gets even more serious then it is now.

[RagnarLodbrok]

This post is exactly why I respect people like you. :thumbup:



True, one of my little brothers got one of those magnet games. To him it made no difference whether he got the GeoMag one for €90 or the ALDI one for €25.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

For my own sake, I am likely to wait until I am maybe 22 or 23 (which is when I will have finished Uni), because before that I know that I cannot give the child the attention it deserves. But I'm not willing to wait much longer than that. As somebody who views children as a "good thing" rather than a burden, I wouldn't even mind six or seven of them running around in the house. If it means that there's no TV in the House, or that we have to buy at LIDL - so be it! :shrug:

Well, of course, first I need to find the right woman before I can decide up these kind of things.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

@ Ragnar: Sounds "stupid" but these are issues that have to be cleared up. My mother always wanted another child, but my stepfather said he was content with just looking after me. There were several arguments and grievances, until it actually happened by accident, from which point on my little brother's been my a well-guarded precious, and they've been getting on quite fine. :)

Issues such as timing of children and their upbringing, and/or religion, worldview etc. are a crucial point; to some extent politics as well. For example, I could never be with a woman that hates nature, is a fundi Christian, wants a single child at age 40 and was a total lefty race-mixing person.
They tell you from a young age that "opposites attract". That may be the case with some people, but when there are common factors, there is a chance that the whole thing will actually last. Here I have to look at my parents who always had different viewpoints and stayed together for only 7 years, 10 months of which married, 2 1/2 yrs with a common child, until they divorced; and compare it to my paternal grandparents, who stayed together, married for 48 years, with 6 children, 24 grandchildren and (so far) 2 greatgrandchildren, and who were always united by common interests - until death did them part (2001, when my grandfather died aged 74). Same for my maternal grandparents. They have been married for 45 years now, without greater problems. Common interests, same political opinion, same profession when still working, etc., with 3 children, all of which became healthy adults.

Common interests, common viewpoints, a number of children and love - if all these things are there, it is likely that the whole thing will last for a long time; children are, usually, a thing that binds two people together (sadly not always :().
Now call me a useless romantic, but I believe that if there's the *extraordinary* connection, then it may last forever. :D

Yes I know this is why I am working to make this relationship work before we get married. I do not want to become another divorce statistic.

I am against all forms of divorce.

[RagnarLodbrok]

My wife just read this and here is her opinion:



Well, those are just a few of the things she ranted on about, she doesn't have much time for anyone that would put money or career before children.

Your wife sounds wise and her thoughts on the subject are the same as mine.

We really don't want children now but since we are in a very serious relationship we were merely putting the conversation out there.

[RagnarLodbrok]

I've come to the realisation that when I'm lying on my death bed one day, I won't think back about the money I strived for (which is usually an endless dream no matter what position you're in financially.. "I could have xxx if I just worked a bit more..."). I want to be surrounded by my children and family when I pass from this realm. In my opinion one of the reasons our folk is dying out is because women are putting off having children for so long, often times until it's too late and they have to seek fertility treatments and spend thousands of dollars just to have one! Our capitalist society has really warped our "needs". I ask myself, What's the point of having a huge house if you don't have a dozen kids running around in it? :)


I agree with everything you have said as well. I too want to die surrounded by my family and offspring.

[RagnarLodbrok]

Katia,
I believe the main challenge in rearing children today vs. 50+ years ago is that it used to only take one income to raise a family. It can still be done but, as more women enter the workforce and neglect the home life the pay-per-family is diluted. The capitalist society expects women to work and the pay reflects this. I have not asked my wife to work, ever. She plans to in a few years but only as something she wants to do when our children are both in school.

It is a shame when a society places more emphasis on material gain than on their own families.

Indeed it is a shame and somthing should be done to change our society.

[RagnarLodbrok]

That is true. A girl at school was daughter to a rich man. Single child. Father left home pretty soon, and the mother was left with the House (the father had 7 others anyway!). The daughter now inhabits five (!) rooms, and does not have a clue what to do with them! :rolleyes:
This house should have given place for at least 11 or 12 children! And the budget too! So why is it that those that can provide the best for children are always those that choose to have none, is what I ask myself?!


I ask myself that too! :o

[attak53]

Hey Brother,

I'm going to throw my 2 cents in in the ring here and you can do what you like with them. This comes from past experience as I've been divorced once (and have a beautiful 10 year old son with her) and I will be getting married again in September (as of now I've been with this woman for a little over five years).

This isn'r going to be a post that says keep this one or dump her as fast as you can. I know from your iriginal post in this thread that you said that you love her a lot and she is to you what the other relationships that you had lacked. But we've PM'd back and forth on other subjects and I've read your posts in this thread as well as others and I know that you hold some very strong views. My advice to you (this might sound old fashioned) is to make a list of lets say the 10 most important things in your life in the other column put down her opinion on those items that are most important to you. By looking at this list it should give you an idea if there is enough there to try and make this work or not. I'm not a believer in the opposite attracts theory at least not when it comes to major life decisions and if her views differ in most of the issues that are important to you it would seem that throughout your life together there will be problems. Once again I'm no shrink and the couple classes in college don't qualify me for nothing but like I said I'm throwing my 2 cents out there to give you something to think about. If you need me friend just PM me I'm here for you.

--Todd

[Zelda]

You are still fairly "young" in your relationship but it is good to be thinking about differences in values because I think it's important for a married couple to have shared values when it comes to having and raising children. As for the age of having children, here are some things to think about that others have not mentioned. If you both want to have 2 or 3 children, then waiting until mid-30's is a risk, biologically. Eggs are older then and sometimes not as viable. That doesn't mean she needs to start having children at 18 or even 20 - there may be a compromise there. And as for your girlfriend wanting to go to college first and pursue a career, I think it may not be totally about money and material things as others have assumed. A woman who is a good mother is a woman who is happy with herself and she may be someone who would be unhappy thinking that she had not pursued her intellectual interests before having children. I did not have a child until I was in my mid-30's and I am glad that I got a college education and had some experiences in the world that then helped me share those things with my family. Another compromise position that no one has mentioned is for her to finish college, have a couple children and then you stay home with the children while she pursues her career. And if you chafe at that suggestion, take some time to examine your own feelings and see if you might not understand hers a bit better. I would say it is not a good idea to marry you both work out these important issues so it's great you're talking about them! Zelda

[Schwarzesonne]

I think that the advice offered by attak 53 and especially by Zelda is very sound and that you’d be wise to consider their words. And one more thing: don’t try to make any unilateral decisions. If the decision(s) being made are about you & her as a couple then they ought to be made by both of you. She’s got just as much invested in the relationship as you do, after all.

[attak53]

And one more thing: don’t try to make any unilateral decisions. If the decision(s) being made are about you & her as a couple then they ought to be made by both of you. She’s got just as much invested in the relationship as you do, after all.

I don't think a stronger statement could have been made than this.

[RagnarLodbrok]

Hey Brother,

I'm going to throw my 2 cents in in the ring here and you can do what you like with them. This comes from past experience as I've been divorced once (and have a beautiful 10 year old son with her) and I will be getting married again in September (as of now I've been with this woman for a little over five years).

This isn'r going to be a post that says keep this one or dump her as fast as you can. I know from your iriginal post in this thread that you said that you love her a lot and she is to you what the other relationships that you had lacked. But we've PM'd back and forth on other subjects and I've read your posts in this thread as well as others and I know that you hold some very strong views. My advice to you (this might sound old fashioned) is to make a list of lets say the 10 most important things in your life in the other column put down her opinion on those items that are most important to you. By looking at this list it should give you an idea if there is enough there to try and make this work or not. I'm not a believer in the opposite attracts theory at least not when it comes to major life decisions and if her views differ in most of the issues that are important to you it would seem that throughout your life together there will be problems. Once again I'm no shrink and the couple classes in college don't qualify me for nothing but like I said I'm throwing my 2 cents out there to give you something to think about. If you need me friend just PM me I'm here for you.

--Todd

You have good advice. I do know that we agree with almost everything except for a few issues.

Though the issues we do not agree on are indeed important to me , I can usually live with our difference of opinion. Though we have good arguements on them and not all are bad.

The main thing we argue on constantly is our ideals of marriage and family.


I am heavily against divorce and I seek to find a woman I can marry one time and be with til old age and death comes. Marriage is the top ten of things in life that I desire.


She does not believe in marriage because she has been hurt so much in life as well her parents have divorced that she sees marriage as a prison or somthing of the other. She says she would give marriage another chance but only through waiting a long time with someone she deems worthy. Even then she says she is not so sure about the concept of marriage.


Also she is weary of children I have come to learn. She always boasts she will wait til after college,occupation, and young age before she feels comfortable to start a family.

I on the other hand feel that children in you middle twenties is acceptable. Also I am the opposite of being weary of children.

Again for all reading this , this is just talk of the future as I have no intentions of rushing anything.


I know there are differences of beliefs within every human being especially relationships. I am confident and hopeful that me and my girlfriend will compromise our beliefs for the great good of ourselves.

I am indeed grateful for everyones help here.

[attak53]

The positive thing is that you are not rushing into anything and that you know that the two of you have some differences that need to be sorted out before the relationship moves any further. This may sound cliche but if it truly meant to be everything will fall into place for the both of you.

[RagnarLodbrok]

The positive thing is that you are not rushing into anything and that you know that the two of you have some differences that need to be sorted out before the relationship moves any further. This may sound cliche but if it truly meant to be everything will fall into place for the both of you.

This is what I believe as well. :)

[attak53]

Good or bad all things work out for a reason and in the end (though at the time things happen it may not seem so) we are truly better of for it.

By the way there is a PM from a couple days ago that you haven't opened, Truthfully i don't even remember what is in it.

[Don vonMilikowski]

By the way there is a PM from a couple days ago that you haven't opened, Truthfully i don't even remember what is in it.


Probably letters attached together to make words attached together to make sentances attached together to make paragraphs..... My best guess.

Ragnar - What I learned through my life, life is like the ocean...... Enjoy your time with her, whether it lasts a year or one hundred years. Pick your battles, not all battles can be won - know when to withdraw. Don't get me wrong, divorce sucks - especially when kids are involved, but things happen for a reason. All you got is here and now, tomorrow will come, let it unfold on its own - yesterday is gone, let it go.

Two rules of life -
1) Don't sweat the small stuff
2) Everything is small stuff

That is why I look like I am ten years younger than I am. Don't get me wrong, I have had some rough times - but I get it out of my system in one way or another.

Then again, some things in life we have to learn on our own........ Surf when the waves are high, then watch the sunset........

[RagnarLodbrok]

Probably letters attached together to make words attached together to make sentances attached together to make paragraphs..... My best guess.

Ragnar - What I learned through my life, life is like the ocean...... Enjoy your time with her, whether it lasts a year or one hundred years. Pick your battles, not all battles can be won - know when to withdraw. Don't get me wrong, divorce sucks - especially when kids are involved, but things happen for a reason. All you got is here and now, tomorrow will come, let it unfold on its own - yesterday is gone, let it go.

Two rules of life -
1) Don't sweat the small stuff
2) Everything is small stuff

That is why I look like I am ten years younger than I am. Don't get me wrong, I have had some rough times - but I get it out of my system in one way or another.

Then again, some things in life we have to learn on our own........ Surf when the waves are high, then watch the sunset........

Thank You Don for your support. :)

I always try to live day by day.

[attak53]

Probably letters attached together to make words attached together to make sentances attached together to make paragraphs..... My best guess.



Holy crap, your right!

I don't care what the others say Don you're an entertaining guy, glad you're here to break up all the seriousness sometimes. :)